Last night, I cried a lot. For the first time in a long time, I just bawled. Usually, I Want to cry but can't. Yesterday, it just came pouring out of me without warning. I felt really sorry for myself. Mostly, I felt acute hurt, the kind of hurt that only comes from the people … Continue reading Crying, Trying
I'm not okay. I live in dark thoughts most of the time these days. Nothing seems to bring real light to my life. I feel unloved, ignored, forgotten by most people. I know that this pandemic has resulted in a lot of difficulties for everyone. Everyone is having a hard time and coping in their … Continue reading Struggling
Really great article I thought anyone here would benefit from.
As I’m sure anyone with anxiety is well aware, some days are good and some are bad. Some days I feel like I’m on top of the world and some days I have so much anxiety that my anxiety gives me more anxiety. It’s as though I am fearing the fear itself.
Thankfully, over the years, I’ve managed to come up with a few means to calm myself down when I need to get my balance in check. I think of it much like self-care, but not in the way that most lists you find around the internet make it out to sound. No face masks, no essential oils, just balance. Balance is key, I find.
- Playing https://rainymood.com/. There’s something so peaceful about the sound of rain for me that it reminds the mind to simmer down and take life easy.
- Go to Yoga. Now this one is…
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Thus far, I have spent most of my life feeling utterly unattractive with brief spurts of self love sprinkled in between. For the last few months all I feel is general self loathing. I feel lonely and empty. I feel unaccomplished and unmotivated. Mostly, I feel fat and ugly. "Fat and ugly," is a refrain … Continue reading Fat and Ugly
Slowly but surely, boredom is killing me. I am stress eating constantly because I'm bored and getting depressed as a result. I have nothing to do and nothing I want to do, no motivation to do even the most basic things I really need to get done, no energy to keep up with the few … Continue reading Boredom is Killing Me
I realized recently that I am actively avoiding going to therapy. I don't know exactly why I'm doing this but I am. I have a session coming up soon and have been trying to script exactly what I will and won't say to my therapist during that session. Why am I doing this? I have … Continue reading Scared to go to Therapy
We live in a world where criticism is all too common and praise is hard to come by. I am guilty of criticizing freely and bluntly. I do, however, also try to give credit where it's due and to praise or compliment what I think is worthy. I just don't do it often enough. Appreciation … Continue reading Quick to Criticize, Slow to Praise
This post began as an ode to a broken past and has ended as something else entirely. Anyone of us who has dared to dream has definitely found obstacles on the way to achieving said dreams. Some of us never make it to the 'achievement' part of that dream because we give up along the … Continue reading Broken Dreams
A bout of depression has struck me once more. I feel incoherent and irrational today. I keep trying to go back in time and make sense of things. I keep on trying to figure it out - where did I make my first mistake and when did I make my last one? Sometimes, I regret … Continue reading Incoherent and Irrational
Sweet Deception "It all seemed so perfect I guess lies are that way They wait until you're tangled in them Wrapped in their beauty and the minute you start to believe they're real They rip apart all the hope you had left." - Samantha King (Born to Love, Cursed to Feel) Hanging on to the … Continue reading Deleted