Crying my eyes out

I have just spent the last hour and a half crying in the bathtub because I wish I didn't exist. It has been a while since I last felt this way but I think this was creeping up on me for the last several weeks. There are literally two people in this entire world who … Continue reading Crying my eyes out

Failure and Success

Failure is normal, success is not. That is why we all aspire towards success. We find success exceptional and admirable in general. Failure, however, is an undesirable outcome in most instances. For many people, it is to be avoided at all costs. Have you ever had a task that you wanted to succeed at so … Continue reading Failure and Success

My Inner Landscape

Craggy and worn like a broken rock on the shoreline of a tumultuous sea, deep and unexplored like the darkest depths of the ocean, teeming with both horrific and indescribable creatures, with enough pressure to crumble mountains to dust - that is my current inner landscape. I alternate between anger and depression. The withdrawal symptoms … Continue reading My Inner Landscape

Death by crying?

For the past month, I have cried almost every day. Sometimes it's because I'm failing all my classes in grad school. Sometimes because I'm an inadequate teacher. Sometimes because I'm a sucky daughter and an absentee sister. But mostly because I feel unattractive, undesirable, unneeded and sometimes unwanted. Being an unneccessary existence sucks. Being a … Continue reading Death by crying?